Sex+: “พร (porn) // wish (n.)” by Max Pasakorn

พร (porn) // wish (n.)

Last year, I earned a Bachelor’s Degree in the Fine Art of porn production. I learned how to crumple with the creases of my body and crawl to the camera on all fours. Yes. Get into these close-up shots. My orifices are warp tunnels to alternate dimensions. Look how malleable my chest is when I flex, how my butt-cheeks waddle loose. See how my slinky clothes can drop and hang on my hard-on like a bouncing hook. That’s why they still call us hookers. My pelvis knows you lick up the spontaneous humping, when the cock and balls beat the air in rapid succession, over-eager windchimes in a thunderstorm. Fountain pen refilled with ink. Gas station pumps with grungy nozzles. Oh, and, don’t forget my flauntable face: cheekbones that dip downward like an LED arrow on a billboard sign; soft brown eyes highly experienced in customer service. Messy, blurry, bushy hair for excursions into the wild. I can be as tender as my uvula or as dangerous as furrowed brows. Don’t be charmed when I catch the light. It’ll be very expensive. The school taught us to be bespoke human business models. To use our big guns to negotiate with the big guns. To get fucked only by the famous alum. To invest in a bedroom with extraordinary camera angles. When I am on livestream, I am aware of formless bodies watching, touching, relieving, releasing alternate versions of themselves out to die, so they can resume their normal lives. But they will come back, when the hunger for my tart body revives in the blue backlight. Repeat customers get extra.

About Max Pasakorn

Max Pasakorn (he/she/they) is a queer, Thai-born, Singapore-based essayist and poet. Max’s writing, predominantly about their identities, has been published in Chestnut Review, Freeze Ray Poetry, Strange Horizons, Defunkt Magazine, EXHALE: an anthology of queer Singaporean voices, and more. Read more about Max at www.maxpasakorn.works.